This is somewhat an apology with a side backstory? I don't know how to describe it.
Anyways, I apologize if I'm not ontop of replying back to the roleplay for the next couple days or however long. Depends on my state of mind that I have. If I do, it probably won't be the best since I'm a little numb and detatched from everything and anything.
Everything has been going bad in my life at the current moment, well, mostly the new year. I kind of called that 2011 would be a bad year, anyway. Doesn't help that my main support, my boyfriend/best friend, will be away and get deployed to the Middle-East in July. So, I'm terrified about that, kind of adds more injury to my current depression that I have.
I'm losing my other close best friend, one that I've been with for more than a decade and it hurts. Then, with college fast approuching. I have a feeling that I won't be able to keep in touch with others that I'm close to since they're all venturing far away. So, I feel quite alone. I know this is just me ranting and giving off a sad vibe, but I just feel like I need to tell someone. :/
:( awe Evil, I'm sorry about all of that... try to make the best of everything, especially the time you have left with your boyfriend. Take your time and heal up well, I can see how that can be emotional. Best of luck to you, try and smile whenever you can. Do things you love that you normally don't do and even if the reason your fading from you best friend is because of a fight, if you really want to keep her try and plan something/do something that you both enjoy, say sorry and be nice give her a present or something. Good luck you and I'm sorry about all your stress.. :/
Well, the time with my boyfriend kind of ended. His flight leaves in a few hours and I wasn't able to give him a proper good-bye. So, now I have to wait for him to return. I've tried to do things that I love. Like coloring and drawing and what not, but I just don't find them to enjoyable in a way? I just feel like staring off into space or withdraw into my own thoughts.
I don't really know why my best friend and I are fading. Yeah, we had a few fallouts but we got over that. But, it just seems that we're slowly changing and it hurts because I'm trying everything I can to fix it, while it seems she doesn't want it.
Evil, you know we support you with this and we understand completely that you may not have the muse to do much of anything. I think it's important to remember that even though we don't all 'know' each other were still pretty good friends :] I'm sorry about you boyfriend and you friends I think the most I ca say about that is that even if you've lost a really good old friend take this opportunity to make new friends I'm sure you'll find a new awesome friend.:]
Wow. That all sucks. Um...And about the friend, she could just be having like... I dunno. But that's what my friend did to me once. Like, she all of a sudden got really pissy and stuff a me. Turns out she was having a really hard time with her life (What with all her family forgetting to wish her a happy birthday...) Like, she was just really mean and stuff. Give your friend some time,tell her you love her, and that you'll be there for her.
And take your time. If you want, just announce someone temporary mod or whatever, and take a leave. It's alright. And if you want to talk with someone, you know we're always here for you,kay?
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I'm not done with these yet, but after I make my wolves, I can make yours, 1 PP for 5 wolves, if that sounds fair.
No problem, and yeah definatly agreeing with iana and ben. Take it easy Evil. :) good luck to you..
If coloring doesn't work, and zoning into thoughts does, do what I do.. I go out and find a nice peaceful spot (the roof, my wall, beach, the pond in my neighborhood) and bring music, maybe a snack (bread for ducks!) And whatever else, something comfy or whatnot and just sit there for awhile, it actually helps me a lot, calming down and just enjoying life outdoors, idk I like to do it, but if you want you should give it a try. Even color at some random area and draw the scenary? (If so definatly post pics :P)
Thank you to all of you. And yes, I am thankful that I consider all of you friends, more than just roleplay buddies.
Ben, my friend has always had a hard time with her life and I've been there 100% of the way. Now, her life has gotten better and it seems I'm being pushed off to the side. We've talked, and I've told her that no matter what and if it doesn't seem like it. That I'll always be there. She agrees, but then acts differently later. :/
Sarah, I've done that before but since it's freezing and snowing outside. Kind of limits that. But, if I do, mostly with the drawings. I'll definitly post them up for you guys to take a lookie at. :)
Oh.. see, I forget about snow considering I'm in florida and spend everyday sweating lol. BUT if it was snowing, id still go outside, cause its friggin SNOWWWW LOL. Oh I wish I could see it!
lol, i would love it too sarah. sweating everyday gets old really fast.. the beach doesn't, and i love being tan, but i could use some snow for a month or two, i'd be nice. lol.
and awwe EvilDragon I am so sorry to hear about all of that.. you should be happy that you have a boyfriend atleast! And I've lost a lot of friends, it really does suck but I've come to realise that eventually all i'm gunna have in life is a husband so why worry about friends anyways? It'll be nice during the moment but I know that eventually everyone starts their own life, and they all fade away at some point.. :/
but, there may be a friend you can hold on to, and if you can make it through tough times like these, maybe you have a chance? :)